Tuesday, September 28, 2010

On My Break: Flat Soda

I hear on the radio and read about random things we do in life that pertain to what kind of person we are. I don't really believe in those kind of things, but I do have reasons why I do certain things because of my personality. I like flat soda. I don't drink soda often but when I do, I like it flat. I like cold pizza. I guess mainly with food, I'll eat anything as long as it's not expired or has something growing from it. I think as a person I learned not to care about what state a piece of food is, or a person is. As long as they're still there. With people, I don't mind if you don't like anything I like, or that if you're a friend that comes and goes, or one that, went. It's not going to change they way I see you. It doesn't change my consideration of you or someone elses status in my life.. you come out, the same way you came in. The doors always open. - God is love

'til the lights go out



I never knew how physical discipline could contribute to my mental, and emotional well being. I'm most definitely not going to be getting any gym membership or protein powder. But without P.E., without dance, what I got is, 1 hour, a leather sphere, a caged square.. and a lot of peace. 12 is when the lights go out. - God is love & basketball

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Witness

There comes a point in your life where you do have to become conscious of the world. When you're one of those people that don't give a ?uck about a lot. We can go through life, not caring at all what people think. We can't go through life not wondering what they do think. We have points in our lives where we will ourselves to make changes. There are things in our past that we didn't have patience to grow into. There are times when we think all our decisions are correct. When we feel we have total control. We shouldn't have full control of our lives. No one man should have all that Power. Yeah, I was an asshole and I was loud and obnoxious and gave out my time to people that I wanted to matter in my life and gave less attention to the ones that I should have. I used to pray selfishly and always ask God for a way out. Because I knew what was lessening in me was hurting him. And what I was praying for shouldn't even be considered as a prayer, God, stop hurting yourself by hurting me. And that was my cry for a while. I was ignorant.  
So I took a good year off for myself. I didn't work. I didn't drive nowhere. I listened more than I spoke. I stopped showing up. I got a new phone, that only 5 people knew. I worked in my church. I worked at home. Really thought about the changes I needed to make and the representation of my life. I wanted to be a witness to other people. People that I've done wrong. People that have been there. New people that I meet. I'm not going to make every person change what they think of who I am, but my present day living is a testimony to how my changes were made. I'm not going to touch every person out there and everyone that I come into contact with, but I hope my actions and my words plant that seed. 
I still don't care for what people think of me. And the things I do. I can't change that. But I can change how the message comes out. And the message. How I write my blogs. And take advantage of the positions I'm in to make the world I'm in more positive. I haven't gone through a lot. I hope none of us ever have to go through, addictions, prison, STD's.. etc. Don't let yourself fool yourself that in order for things to be true, it has to happen to you. We're all witnesses in each others lives, it's the truth, and it doesn't matter what we think of it. 

I thrive off of wanting to be honest, in everything that I do. I'm a quieter person now, and I hope people can pick up on my non verbal cues. I might do things that may seem off, or offensive, It doesn't mean that I'm wrong but I think there are times when things have to be done at a certain time for people to accept it properly. You gotta come with a lot of patience. The key to changing perception, is changing it for real. - God is Love

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Popular Belief



I think I've misplaced my creative writing parts of my brain somewhere, but here's what I found. 
Roll a spliff to the ones that "Do what they love.. ?uck everything else" - Dwayne from Little Miss Sunshine. Little Miss Sunshine is one of the only movies I own on dvd. I caught it on television earlier this evening. For the past year, I've been really big on individuality and expression. From the past years I've learned how quick people come to conclusions. Formulate judgements. Put 2 and 18 together to make up a truth that's a lie. But. truth is, none of that matters. Because people are going to do, what they do. When they want to, and who they want to do it with. (Yeah yeah, that's what she said). That was the people on the outside looking in. 
Here's one for the people on the Inside, looking, in. Thank you. What're you doing? What are you doing? Oh yeah, that's right, you're doing you. - God is Love

Friday, September 17, 2010

Monday, September 13, 2010

Oh, Maker

When I was alone I was very good at ignoring my convictions. My father told me my senselessness would leave me cents less. Everyone around me felt so pretentious. And that loneliness is what turned me against them. I ask God, "Why WHY have you sent them?!". Exhale and ask God "Please, Bless them". My troubles, I thought they were best kept, in the hearts of people who reject them. Murder murder, facebook friend requests, ignore and reject. Done from A-Z who the fuck is next? Twitter Tweetin who reads the text. @yourelazy @lyricsfromasong @subliminalmessagetotheboywhothrewawaymyheart. 
Do you know do you know what a life is? Do you know do you know more than 2 white kids? Do you know do you know what plight is? Pass me the rock..pass me the ball, ya'll think it's a game, ya'll can have it all. I would never wish another brother the top of the world cause all you get is money, cars, good weed and girls. 1 good party and your whole life is brighter, 1 good club night your whole click invited, but happens when you become a 1 nighter? Oh Maker can you lead me to the pearls of this world.. help me make her a pearl in my world rather than putting pearls on this girl. Oh Maker I hear your voice loud, and even in this drunk crowd like... "you fancy huh.. you fancy huh.. you fancy huh...you're dancin' huh, youre nancy huh, we're dancing huh, you fancy huh, I cant be a, 'nother face at this club, cause I'm dancin huh... with my shackles off. I'm a free free man, Oh maker can you please get me, paid for my bail but this world is tempting. I know you got a purpose to put me on this earths surface but I'm wonderin' I'm wonderin' if this is all worth it. You gave me my confidant, she gon' be my partner. I'll come across constituents that there'll be a lot of. Put me against my comrades cause I don't need this many contacts... Oh Maker tell these people tell these people that I'm back, I'm back, I'm back, I'm back, I'm back... but I've been here. 
Oh Maker, keepin' me heavy on the G.R.I.N.D. .. and still find it amazing that your love is mine. - "God is Love".. tattooed on my chest so I never will forget again. 

Monday, September 6, 2010

What Rules?



A friend during a conversation said "Who are they to tell me what we were"... and I agree. We are all each others unwritten rules. Some choose to follow those rules. Whatever works, for them. But pretty soon, you're going to have to figure out where you stand and who you are. And you're going to have to make a choice whether or not, other people and their unwritten rules are going to put your life in order. And tell you that your life is just like theirs. Or you can tell the world to shove it.. because, "non ducor duco".."I am not led, I lead".- God is Love

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Facebook

I don't know why they have palm readers. I don't even know how palm reading works. But if it really did work, the biggest social media network would be called "Palmbook".
We can see a lot in a persons face. It's like, a book. Exactly. Faces tell us about the kind of life someones been living. We can seen if someones spent most of their life laughing and smiling, we can tell in the lines around their mouth and cheek. Grumpy old men usually have brushy eyebrows and downward features on their face cause they've spent their whole life frowning. ha. We can see the duality of someones life in their face. If they've had a mix of both immensely happy years of their lives and extreme lows. We can tell by the way they smile, if they're used to smiling, if their comfortable enough to smile in front of you. If they smile with their teeth or their lips. And their eyes. How tense their stare is. How bright their eyes are, and if their soul just as bright. A portrait of a person explains a lot. And that's all I ever need to know. When I look at you. When I look at her. When you look at him. Really look, feel their face if you want to. But that's where the story starts. That's where it ends. See how their status' change. And you might want to take a look in the mirror too, and take a look at yourself. I promise you'll 'Like' what you see. - God is Love

Pursuit of Joyfulness


Anyone can be happy. Anyone can be unhappy. Happiness is a pick-me-up in our lives. It's good, if we're always happy. I mean, that's great. People always talk about the pursuit of their happiness but I don't think that's what we should be chasing. God believes in our everlasting joy. Yeah, there's a difference. Joy is, forever. It's understood that we can't always be happy with everything that happens in our lives. But joy, joy is what keeps us content. Joy is what's going to pull us through. People ask me.. Donnel, why are you so happy? I tell them I'm not, I'm not happy, I'm joyful. The reason why I feel like I have enough is because I'm joyful. Because whether or not I have a job, or whether or not my life is going in the direction I'd like it to go.. I'm confident in my prayers that this is what His plan is for me. I may not be happy when I look in my empty wallet or I didn't get that one big break but I'm joyful, still. I'll take my chances and seize my opportunities. They might all be successful, they might all be a failure. I guess, the point I'm trying to make is, that we shouldn't be in pursuit of happiness when we aren't, We should be in search of the joy in what we have in our lives. What we have left after all the successes and failures, is what's going to pull us through. - God is Love