Witness

There comes a point in your life where you do have to become conscious of the world. When you're one of those people that don't give a ?uck about a lot. We can go through life, not caring at all what people think. We can't go through life not wondering what they do think. We have points in our lives where we will ourselves to make changes. There are things in our past that we didn't have patience to grow into. There are times when we think all our decisions are correct. When we feel we have total control. We shouldn't have full control of our lives. No one man should have all that Power. Yeah, I was an asshole and I was loud and obnoxious and gave out my time to people that I wanted to matter in my life and gave less attention to the ones that I should have. I used to pray selfishly and always ask God for a way out. Because I knew what was lessening in me was hurting him. And what I was praying for shouldn't even be considered as a prayer, God, stop hurting yourself by hurting me. And that was my cry for a while. I was ignorant.  

So I took a good year off for myself. I didn't work. I didn't drive nowhere. I listened more than I spoke. I stopped showing up. I got a new phone, that only 5 people knew. I worked in my church. I worked at home. Really thought about the changes I needed to make and the representation of my life. I wanted to be a witness to other people. People that I've done wrong. People that have been there. New people that I meet. I'm not going to make every person change what they think of who I am, but my present day living is a testimony to how my changes were made. I'm not going to touch every person out there and everyone that I come into contact with, but I hope my actions and my words plant that seed. 

I still don't care for what people think of me. And the things I do. I can't change that. But I can change how the message comes out. And the message. How I write my blogs. And take advantage of the positions I'm in to make the world I'm in more positive. I haven't gone through a lot. I hope none of us ever have to go through, addictions, prison, STD's.. etc. Don't let yourself fool yourself that in order for things to be true, it has to happen to you. We're all witnesses in each others lives, it's the truth, and it doesn't matter what we think of it. 

I thrive off of wanting to be honest, in everything that I do. I'm a quieter person now, and I hope people can pick up on my non verbal cues. I might do things that may seem off, or offensive, It doesn't mean that I'm wrong but I think there are times when things have to be done at a certain time for people to accept it properly. You gotta come with a lot of patience. The key to changing perception, is changing it for real. - God is Love